Getting Angry

I am angry when I feel my boss is arrogantly ignorant and stupidly arrogant, I am angry when I enter my kitchen and there is nothing to eat, I am angry when the kids messes up everything I have spotlessly cleaned, and I am angry when people conveniently park their cars on the entrance to my parking lot and I am irritatingly angry when people honk their cars in the parking lot at any time of the day or night.

Buddhism describes Anger as an emotion. It also describes Anger can be both positive and negative depending on the intention which ofcourse is then connected to the level of spiritual attainment of an individual. 

My personal take on this is; since my perceptions are based on very very myopic view of the whole cosmology and the understanding of mind; my anger can never be justified as intentionally good. I would rather relate my anger to my own desire, attachment, aggression and ignorant nature of my mind, particularly when it doesn’t conform to my way of perceiving things. 

Rather, my anger erupts when my ego is hurt either by ill treatment, or when things don’t go the way I would like to; when what I hoped doesn’t work and when my fear becomes true; when I don’t get praised for what I do and instead get blamed for not doing enough; when those that pleases me are short lived and those that pains me lasts longer; and when I lose everything I have gained within the blink of my eye.  

On a secular level, anger is described as an emotion related to one’s psychological interpretation of having been offended, wronged or denied and the tendency to revolt against such feelings.

An account of a my day with regards to service sectors

March 12, 20100: Today is a weekend, and a Saturday for that matter. A perfect day to make up for all the week’s unfinished businesses.  It’s a perfect day because service sectors such as Banks, RICB, and Hospitals among others are open while you have holiday.

Among the list of to-do-lists, there are few social services including a regular donation of blood.

8AM, drop off my kids to school, wait till 9AM circumbulating, and at 9AM proceed to the blood bank for blood donation. Then go to RICBL, sort out the procedural lapses there in person, else they will only promise to call you back and never do. All planned, everything should be over by 11AM, then pick the kids up from school, go home eat an early lunch and go for a half day trek to a nearby monastery.

Wow, sounds perfect till you actually start proceeding.

Till the circumbulation it was ok. At the blood bank, you wait what seems like an eternity grappling with the temptation to just leave without waiting. One part of the neuron protesting to leave while the other part protesting that the blood is donated not for the staffs but for a needy being whoever he/she maybe later.  Patiently waiting as if seeking a favour, of course you are seeking a favour from the qualified personnel to help someone in need later.   

Then coming out of the hospital, as I drive away from the parking lot, the guy comes for the parking fee and says Nu.15 madam. I smile and joke at him, next time please tell your doctor/staff to keep me longer so that they get more parking fees for the development of the hospital. He smiles back at me.

Now, as I drive away slowly I am wondering if I can make it to the other office. I am sure there I will have to wait another 90minutes or more, which will automatically make me waste the rest of the day.

And there goes all my other plans down the drain………….ruined just for a unit of blood!!!

MAYBE I JUST DON”T KNOW HOW TO MANAGE MY TIME